The Story Behind “He’s Creepy”: White Men-Black Women

Some wonderful single, black women I know have recently been considering, for the first time, dating outside of our race. A set of circumstances – namely, building an intentionally multiracial community with Christian friends – has made that a viable and even reasonable proposition for them. For the first time, they can actually imagine (and…

When Love Was a Crime

With Nelson Mandela’s recent passing, I’ve found myself reflecting on South Africa’s apartheid history a lot. I have reflected on the significance of his life and passing for me personally (socio-politically and economically) and South Africa’s future (in the country’s pursuit of reconciliation, freedom and justice) elsewhere. Yet, this blog seems the appropriate place for a reflection on…

What’s In A Name?

One of my dear relations through marriage has, for the last three years that Dan and I have been married, consistently misspelled my name. Dan and I have tried to gently draw her attention to the fact a number of times (by signing my full name at the end of emails or Dan posting a…

Let’s not end the discussion on racist graffiti in NH superficially

(This opinion piece appeared in the Concord Monitor both in print and online on Sunday, October 20, 2013.) On Tuesday, the Concord Monitor reported that a 42-year-old man, Raymond Stevens, had been charged with writing racist graffiti on black, African refugees’ Concord homes in 2011 and 2012. This was after Detective Wade Brown had painstakingly combed through 1,500…

How to Know a “Sell Out” When You See One

When people think of prominent black-white couples, figures that come to mind might include “sensational” (read: chock full of drama) pairings, Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren/Lindsey Vonn, Kobe Bryant and Vanessa Laine Bryant (though she’s actually Hispanic), and Lamar Odom and Khloe Kadashian (in the picture). And for many ordinary black people, these guys ‘sold…

Travelling While Recognisably Black and Part of An Interracial Couple

Dan and I recently returned from a trip to Brazil and Argentina. On our flight back, we finished reading the masterpiece by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, “Americanah”. It was the combination of the two (the trip and the book) that inspired this post. In the book, Adichie’s protagonist, Ifemelu writes a post for her race blog…

Who’s afraid of the black man?

Parking in the city has never been my strong suit. Where I come from in Temple, New Hampshire (population 1,200), parking lots are plentiful and meters are few and far between. If it’s not a formal establishment, you simply pull over to the side of the road and hope a passing snowstorm doesn’t snow you in….

Raising Interracially Adopted Black Babies – Part 2

In Part 1 of this post, I argued that interracially adopted black babies ought to be taught a vernacular (African) language at first language proficiency to give them the option of communing with other black people who share their experiences of being black in a (sadly, still) highly racialised world. In this part, I expand…

Raising Interracially Adopted Black Babies – Part 1

For the first time, I am blogging per request and to give advice explicitly. I suppose I say that up-front, not to suggest that I haven’t thought about the topic lots beforehand, but because I had held off blogging about this rather sensitive subject out of doubt that I had the right to speak on…

Black Women-Black Men: Where is the Love?

Sitting at my desk at work, not long after Dan and I got married, one of the cleaning ladies walked into my office. After the warm greeting we exchanged, she caught sight of Dan’s and my wedding photo on my computer desktop. She asked if that was my husband. I enthusiastically responded, “yes!” As she…